The Less Popular Side of Grace

Grace, as everyone knows, is that "gift received, undeserved." While this understanding is useful, indeed, it is also limiting and, ultimately, deceiving.

Unfortunately, we've come to know grace as something that "blesses" us...and we leave it at that. We're thankful for it, the same way we're thankful for any gift that we receive. Further, we reserve a special kind of thankfulness in cases of grace precisely because we recognize that we don't deserve it, haven't earned it. ...In 21st century American culture (among others), the primary ethos around "receiving gifts" is to have somehow "earned" it. We get gifts at Christmas only if we've been good all year and have made Santa's Good List. ...if we get a lump of coal in our stocking, presumably, we've little creeps. And so on.

So, it is understandable when we receive measures of grace, we feel thankful, forgiven, blessed, etc. Essentially, this dimension of grace, for the receiver of it, is passive. We simply GET it. We simply RECEIVE it--sort of by definition of what have learned grace to be.

But another, critical element of grace is it's transformative nature. That is, Grace not only blesses us, but Transforms us, changes us. Makes us different. But only if we want that. ...But, without the transformational element of grace, grace itself is shortchanged. ...a large piece of the value of a gift received is in the opening of the gift and the USING of the gift, once opened. ...yes, an unopened package under the Christmas tree is still a gift. But the gift, opened and used...now THAT gift has the power transform the receiver of the gift.

In seventh grade, when I received my new, Getzen Eterna (Doc Severenson Model) trumpet, I was very much transformed as a trumpet player. The old, hand-me-down Conn was dented, uninspiring, limiting and just not cool. This new horn was impressive, whacked with potential, intimidatingly shiny (much to the chagrin of Kris Koneitzko)...it helped me to be a better player because I wanted to play it more, wanted to show it off (along with my High C). It was confidence inducing.

If I'd have left it wrapped up under the tree...well, you get the point.

So...when you identify a bit of grace in your life. Challenge yourself to fully engage it. Change. Transform. Grow. It's why grace is given in the first place.

-par

Copper Hair Blowing

His copper hair now blowing,
his mind no longer knowing,
eyes no longer showing
recognition, pain or love.

In my lap his head hangs heavy
as my heart breaks like the levee
holding back the tears of every
painful secret known and kept.

I will miss you, copper friend,
selfless, loving to the end,
our forevers we will spend
loving, remembering you.

("Go slow, Willie. Go slow...")

-par

This Promise Sweet (for Mike and Jess)

This promise sweet, we duly make,
This wondrous day, we do forsake
All counterfeit loves, to favor ours,
This one, our own, reflects the powers
Of the Love of Loves, whose boundless care
We pray to emulate, long to share.

-par
4 15 2011

Whenever the Monsters Come

Whenever the monsters come, they come,
directly to my head.
Whenever the monsters say my name,
they fill me full of dread.
Whenever the monsters show their fangs,
I shudder in my bed
And whenever the monsters never leave
I pray that I’d be dead.

Whenever the angels come, they come,
directly to my heart.
Whenever the angels sing my name,
they tear my fear apart.
Whenever the angels show their faces,
I awaken with a start
And whenever the angels always leave,
my prayers my fears do thwart.

-par

1 6 2011

1974

My dad's Honda Trail 90.
Cuddles on the back.
Mrs. Thompson's Little League baseball team.
Dennis Horn's crack of the bat.

Greg Leno "acting" like fireworks
in the front yard, 4th of July.
Mom in her cut-offs, smoking Pall Malls, laughing,
classic as apple pie.

Hockey on the back yard ice rink.
Scalloped potatoes and ham.
Carol Burnett on Saturday nights,
First Communion at Panger's with Pam.

...recognition of Life-Perfect in fracture,
Suspension of disbelief.
Constructing foundations for coping, deceiving,
investment for payment in grief.

-par
2 2011

Jeremy

Jeremy

Sweet, sweet, beautiful boy,
what made you make that choice?
What compelled you?
What hell befell you?
Who's was that lying voice?

Who convinced you hope was lost,
that your life would be the cost,
for peace like you never dreamed.
That liar's voice that seemed
was exactly that, a "seeming."

Get on with your dreaming.

Rest in peace, sweet boy.

-par
9 2010

The Possibility Looms

Could I possibly be any busier?
Could I possibly be more bored?
Could I possibly be any more confused about
What the hell I’m here for?

If “all things are possible” is true,
Then I guess there’s still a chance
That I could be more busy and could be more bored
Than I am in this circumstance.

But, Man I hope that ain’t true.
I hope like hell it just ain’t.
Cuz, if it’s true there’s no end to this rut that I'm in,
I may have to start sniffing paint.

-par
12 2010